Coffee and T

Sometimes a full table at The Ratcheds Senior Center is comprised of just one person. Now don’t get me wrong. T Rex (fka Thomas King) is a good friend. We’ve had some really great conversations and he’s a brilliant thinker. But every once in a while he can get so wound up a conversation can become a soliloquy. He doesn’t try to dominate the agenda but his energy and enthusiasm kinda hangs over the table like a force field. Sometimes he’s a scholar. Sometimes a curmudgeon . Sometimes his words are profound and you are back in school. Hanging on every syllable. Other times they are so shocking and off the wall you stare in disbelief. Either way T is heard. Today he’s a little more wound up than normal because Wanda is out of town and he has no adult supervision.

“There’s just too much stuff that’s too hard to understand. Last week I accompanied Wanda to a visit with her heart doctor. We sat in the waiting room where they have a closed circuit tv so you don’t get bored and realize how long you are waiting. Now this particular loop is telling you how to avoid coming here in the first place. Eat the right food, get plenty of rest, drink lots of water and eat a bunch of fiber to keep you going. Literally. I don’t get it. Why on earth would you spend beaucoup bucks getting your degrees and learning your trade. Beaucoup more bucks buying or setting up a practice, buying equipment and hiring staff so you can tell people how to put you out of business. The old time dentist had the right idea. Get a checkup, you get a lollipop. Repeat business guaranteed.

I hate when people or companies do stupid stuff. I mean, for crying out loud,
THINK!!! For example, I got a mailer the other day from the Pluto Society. The cremation people, not the Disney dog. Well guess what. They invited me to come to a sales pitch for their services. THEY WERE HAVING A BARBECUE. The cremation people wanted to pitch cremation at a BARBECUE. I guess nobody remembers Soylent Green. Boggle it if you want a chuckle. I say again, THINK. Watch tv and you’re gonna see a commercial for a weight loss drug. Followed by an ad for pizza. And one for beer. But pay attention and you’ll see nobody drinking the beer. It’s gotta be really crappy beer if nobody’s drinking it. So why buy it in the first place. What’s that all about?”

T takes a long slug of coffee and our vegan chef, Sue Keeney, sticks her toe in the water. “T, I agree with you one hundred percent. I get frustrated when supposedly educated and intelligent people butcher the English language.”

“Sue, you have no idea. I was talking about this with Sister Mary Annette the other day. You know her, she runs the puppet show over at the church. Somebody makes up words and put in letters at random so you can’t figure out how to pronounce them. Phlegm for example. Ghoul ! PSEUDO! Who in the world decided on that. And another thing,” he rants,” The other day I was reading about the Flat Earth Society. I mean supposedly smart people think the earth is flat instead of round. Flat is flat and round is round. I bet those are the nitwits that invented the word FLATulence. Well I know where it comes from and it’s for sure got to be round. Think about it ”

Stay tuned for further adventures from Ratcheds By The Sea. A beautiful town on the coast. Where everyone is beautiful and at least one degree off center.

Fred Prout