OPEN OTHER END

The half-pint carton of milk reposed innocently on the kitchen counter. Aha! Just enough for my breakfast smoothie. I grabbed it up, pushed, pulled, pried, cussed and then took a good look at it: Open Other End.
Aren’t there times when you think that pretty well sums up your life? Open Other End. Only this morning, last minute rush to get the Chapter 9 newsletter out, I printed page one, already to go and then stopped to proof read page two. A hum? The computer said “File is Read Only. Locked by other user.” Come on now, there is no “other user”; no one else uses this computer. I fussed around with it and the computer ERASED the file. My precious page two! Undaunted I redid page two and then tried to print: Read Only! I tried a different approach and the computer ERASED my file! Page two, all gone. Again. Need I tell you, there is NO page two of this month’s newsletter! Open Other End.
I remember the time my late husband and I were in a hurry to reach a campground. The
directions were quite good. But! But the map clearly showed a shorter route. So away we
went. Of course, it was a two lane road but who cares? One lane for us, one lane for them. UP hill, down hill, round and round. Suddenly the road dove straight down and there, above the road, was a railroad trestle clearly too low for our fifth wheel rig. Too low. Way too low. Open Other End.
My cat. Remember my FREE cat? A beautiful black and white tuxedo cat “needs a forever
home”. So I adopted her: FREE. Then she managed an escape out into the dangerous world. She came home a few hours later. No problem. The next day she was violently sick: vomiting, wouldn’t eat or drink, didn’t use her litter box. Overnight in the vet’ hospital, IVs. X-rays. And $600 later she came home: poison? Now my FREE cat cost me $600. Open Other End. I googled “Open Other End”, Would you believe there is a song “Open Other End “ by “The Naked Dogs” (really and truly,)? I tried to listen to it but the introductory music was so horrible and “Open Other End” was the seventh song on the recording. I gave up: Open Other End!!
By Jackie Deal

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4 Responses to OPEN OTHER END

  1. Donna says:

    I needed to start my day with a chuckle. This did it. Thanks Jackie!

  2. Carolyn Pennington says:

    Way to go Jackie, I’ve been opening the other end all my life!

  3. Linda Buie says:

    I am so enjoying your essays, Jackie!

  4. Fred Prout says:

    Jackie you nailed it. Life conspires to find open other end situations. We are all forced to DEAL with them. Add some humor and we can all laugh instead of cry.

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